There is a certain kind of naïveté that serves us well. That open, loving, part of us is important for life force, joy, creativity, and healthy connection. But it can shut down when it’s taken advantage of by controlling and malicious people. A function of the organism protecting itself. That’s a good thing, temporarily, But longterm, when you’ve cut yourself off from your energy supply to keep yourself armored in the presence of a negative individual, your energy becomes depleted.
The first thing to do is say bye, bye to Mr. Malicious, the person. The second is to excavate and heal that precious open and loving self, so that you don’t have to stay shut down, bitter, or cynical. But now, you guard it, you protect it, and you take good care of it. You have your own warrior installed, as if you walk with a big, strong cat. And you learn to distinguish who to let in and who not to. Kindness and strength. Daring to be simultaneously naïve and savvy. That’s balance.
Bye, Bye, Mr. Malicious!: How to Get Your Happy Back and Be Done with Narcissists and Sociopaths
by Kanta Bosniak
Top left to right: “Bye Bye Mr. Malicious A line” dress in my Redbubble store. https://www.redbubble.com/people/KantaBosniak/shop
Hallway flowers, detail of portrait of Bucky Fuller, one of a pair of fiber art wall pieces, in Kanta Bosniak Folk Art Gallery.
Bottom left to right: Image from “Bye, Bye, Mr. Malicious!”, postcard from one of my artist-in residencies and shows at Omega, “Ocean Vest” by moi, collection of Edwene Gaines.