Bad Boys & Girls, Wholeness & Creativity

Conventional wisdom, pop culture and romance novels (or so I hear) paint a picture of the bad boy as devastingly attractive to the bad girl in good women. The “purer” she is, the more his bad draws her, like a moth to the flame. There’s also the archetypal bad girl, who draws the virtuous man soul to his ruin in stories, songs and myths aplenty.

To me, this is an old paradigm model, ripe for reframing. Along with the tired old story of dead libido and flatlined creativity in folks over 50 or those who have loved one another for a long time. Supposedly, we must make a choice between connected love and vitality, because the old paradigm splits off sex and creativity from committed, spiritual love.

The stuff of the first 2 chakras- raw energy, and desire- to love, to create- in all its wildness- gets relegated to male and female archetypes of the Rake and Rakette cut off from discernment, warmth and heart-connection. This archtype serves the purpose of giving the lost part in the “other” a way to express itself, albeit an unconscious one. This creates bored, deadened “good” people who make self-destructive decisions because their shadow must out somehow… and falsely glamorous, lonely desperados, cut off from┬áthe heart.

We are now in an age when science has caught up to shamans who have always known the truth that duality and nonduality are simultaneous realities. We’ve been pondering the wave and matter thing, the body and spirit thing for a while now. 50’s babies like myself were introduced to simultaneous realities in our pre-adolescent years with the notion that Certs could be both a breath mint and a candy mint at the same time.

We are ready for new myths. We are ready for that wholeness that allows us to own our wildness, creativity, vulnerability, compassion, and common sense, all at the same time. Let us affirm that we are 360 degree humans who make peace within themselves between the masculine and feminine no longer need to sacrifice one part to serve another. And that this new myth becomes a story we weave into new social mores, politics, institutions, parenting and creative interpersonal relationships of all kinds.

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